Category Archives: listening post

what hurts the most

Posted by rob on

i can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
that don’t bother me
i can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
i’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
even though going on with you gone still upsets me
there are days every now and again i pretend i’m ok
but that’s not what gets me

what hurts the most
was being so close
and having so much to say
and watching you walk away
and never knowing
what could have been
and not seeing that loving you
is what i was tryin’ to do

it’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere i go
but i’m doin’  it
it’s hard to force that smile when i see our old friends and i’m alone
still harder
getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
but I know if i could do it over
i would trade give away all the words that i saved in my heart
that i left unspoken

what hurts the most
is being so close
and having so much to say
and watching you walk away
and never knowing
what could have been
and not seeing that loving you
is what i was trying to do

what hurts the most
is being so close
and having so much to say
and watching you walk away
and never knowing
what could have been
and not seeing that loving you
is what i was trying to do

not seeing that loving you
that’s what i was trying to do
ooohhh . . .

rebirthing

Posted by rob on

 

i lie here paralytic
inside this soul
screaming for you till my throat is numb 
i wanna break out i need a way out 
i don’t believe that it’s gotta be this way
the worst is the waiting
in this womb i’m suffocating

feel your presence filling up my lungs with oxygen 
i take you in
i’ve died

rebirthing now 
i wanna live for love wanna live for you and me
breathe for the first time now
i come alive somehow
rebirthing now 
i wanna live my life wanna give you everything
breathe for the first time now
i come alive somehow

i lie here lifeless
in this cocoon
shedding my skin cause
i’m ready to 
i wanna break out
i found a way out 
i don’t believe that it’s gotta be this way
the worst is the waiting
in this womb i’m suffocating

tell me when i’m gonna live again
tell me when i’m gonna breathe you in
tell me when i’m gonna feel inside
tell me when i’m gonna feel alive

tell me when i’m gonna live again
tell me when this fear will end
tell me when i’m gonna feel inside
tell me when i’ll feel alive . . .

hate me

Posted by rob on

 

i have to block out thoughts of you, so i don’t lose my head
they crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
dropping little reels of tape to remind me that i’m alone
playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
there’s a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
an ounce of peace is all i want for you, will you never call again?
and will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face
and will you never try to reach me, it is i that wanted space

hate me today
hate me tomorrow
hate me for all the things i didn’t do for you
hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow
hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

i’m sober now for three whole months
it’s one accomplishment that you helped me with
the one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing i won’t touch again
in my sick way i want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
while i was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
you never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
you made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
so I’ll drive so fucking far away that i’ll never cross your mind
and do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

hate me today
hate me tomorrow
hate me for all the things i didn’t do for you
hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow
hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

and with a sad heart i say bye to you and wave
kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that i have made
and like a baby boy i never was a man
until i saw your blue eyes cry and i held your face in my hand
and then I fell down yelling “make it go away!”
just make her smile come back and shine just like it used to be

and then she whispered “how can you do this to me?” 
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 hate me today
hate me tomorrow
hate me for all the things i didn’t do for you
hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow
hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you . . .