Category Archives: whatever

the hurt feelings report

Posted by rob on

Date: __________ 2008

Time of Hurtfulness: __________ am/pm

 

A. Which ear were words of hurtfulness spoken into? _____ left _____ right _____ both

B. Is there permanent feeling of damage? _____ yes _____ no

C. Did you need a tissue for the tears?       _____ yes _____ no

 

Reasons for filing this report.  Check which one applies:

1. ___ I am thin-skinned.                    

2. ___ I am a pussy.                             

3. ___ I have woman-like hormones.  

4. ___ I am a little bitch.                      

5. ___ I am a queer.

6. ___ I am a cry baby.                         

7. ___ I want my mommy.                    

8. ___ All of the above.                        

 

Name of the “Real Man” who hurt your sensitive little feelings: ____________________

If you feel that you need someone to hug, go home to Mommy and let her hug you and change your diaper.  If you feel as though you need to speak to someone to soothe you, please call this number: 1-800-CRY-BABY or 1-888-SIS-GIRL.

Girly Man who filed report:  ____________________

Signature of Girly Man:        ____________________

Real Man (person who is being brought up on charges): ____________________

Signature of Real Man:          ____________________

Superintendent’s Signature: ____________________

paraskevidekatriaphobia

Posted by rob on

it’s friday the 13th today, i am not really a superstitious person but i have read that there are individuals out there who freaks out when a friday lands on the 13th. 

well i think all people have a certain “fear” on something, a “morbid fear” on the other hand is what we call as the “phobia”.  I searched on the web about the kinds of phobia and found out that there is a fear of the figure 8, of colors, of technology, of beautiful women, of ugliness, of paper, of cooking, of clowns..

i have fear of the dark, i will never sleep alone in total darkness for i don’t like waking up and seeing nothing.

so, what is your fear?

 

 

 

 

freud inventory test

Posted by rob on

just took a personality test from freud, i tried the same test thrice and it gave me the same result:

oral: you appear to have a good balance of independence and interdependence knowing when to accept help and when to do things on your own.

anal: you appear to be overly self-controlled, organized, and possibly subservient to authority, this effectively narrows your exposure to a wider set of options and ideas lowering the odds that you will make the best decisions in life.

phallic: you appear to have a good balance of sexual awareness and sexual composure.

latency: you appear to be overly practical; don’t undervalue abstract learning, abstract learning increases your ability to make good decisions (and predictions) in the real world so it would be ‘impractical’ to shun it.

genital: you appear to be somewhere between a progressive/openminded and regressive/closeminded outlook on life.

the highest percentile i got was at anal, on which, freud theorized as the stage of psychological development that has the main issue of self control:

an anally fixated person is either irrationally self controlled and servile to authority or has no self control and is compulsively defiant of authority.

sigmund freud thinks i’m an asshole.