riiinnnggg.. rrriiinnngg..

hello?

hi honey, this is daddy.. is mommy near the phone?

no, daddy.  she’s upstairs in the bedroom with uncle paul.

but honey, you haven’t got an uncle paul!

oh yes i do, and he’s upstairs in the room with mommy.

brief pause.

uh, okay then.  this is what i want you to do.  put the phone down on the table, run upstairs, knock on the bedroom door and tell mommy – that daddy’s car just pulled into the driveway.

okay daddy, just a minute.

a few minutes later, the little girl comes back to the phone.

i did it daddy.

and what happened, honey?

well, mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming.  then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now, she isn’t moving at all!

oh my god!  what about your uncle paul?!

he jumped out with no clothes on, too.  he was all scared and he jumped out of the back window, and into the swimming pool.  but i guess he didn’t know that you took out the water last week to clean it.  he hit the bottom of the pool and i think he’s dead.

long pause.

longer pause.

even longer pause.

then daddy says:

swimming pool..?  is this 486 – 5731?

no, i think you have the wrong number!